And away we go
Our first visit to the Doctor’s office was a memorable experience especially for my wife. The vast majority of her family did not or do not have ADHD and judging by the waiting room, most of these parents and guardians hadn’t either. There was a few in there that were rocksteady and calm while most others seemed to be at their wits end.
One mother in particular was on the verge of tears as she called her son on multiple occasions to sit back down or get back to the seat or stop running or… That was Auggie and his mother as well. My wife is a tough woman and I thank God for that because having a child/ children with ADHD is a full sprint marathon. The waiting room was quite full with it being the start of new school year. Most of the children were between five and six and in Kindergarten.
Raising a child or children with ADHD has its challenges but it really only requires one thing. You have to be tough. Oh, you can bend and you can even break but you have to be tough or you’ll be consumed by it. My wife is a tough woman and she has to be. Our children are everywhere instantly, especially Auggie. The frightening part with Auggie is that he has no thought of consequences or danger when he makes a decision. Our daughters will give some thought before jumping from the top step (they will jump but give considerations first). Auggie is on the ground grabbing his ankle while they think about what may come.
My wife’s family hasn’t dealt with ADHD as mine has. In fact, most haven’t. It’s nearly an anomaly according to doctors at my children’s clinic. Once it got a foothold in our family it decided to stay without paying rent. For Auggie’s first visit we met with a child psychologist first and I kid you not… this man was Mr. Magorium. He even looks like Dustin Hoffman. That made the visit oddly comfortable. He spoke with a voice full of joy that connects with a child unlike anything I’ve ever seen. My wife and I were asked to leave the room so Auggie could be given the intelligence quotient test. I’m not bragging when I say this because I’m not dumb and I know what I see. He tested very high. We had no doubts about his i.q. at any point in time. We met with the doctor next, a very young woman who also had a very nice disposition. Then, we met with a teacher/ counselor who specializes in reaching children with acronyms attached. She wasn’t as bubbly and after hearing that her children also have ADHD it was no wonder (it may be that she just prefers being straight and to the point). Regardless, she has a noticeable toughness about her.
Now, don’t take me the wrong way please. Having a child with ADHD does not take a parent’s joy away unless they let it. Auggie is precious human with a big heart and after a day with him, in my mental and physical exhaustion, I’m joyful that I am allowed to be his dad. We left the clinic that day with options. Auggie was diagnosed (after all information was taken into account) with ADHD, ODD and OCD. Our options were to medicate or not to. This particular aspect was my main cause for concern because I knew what the medicine could do and was scared I would lose who Auggie actually is. I didn’t want to lose the boy I love to accommodate someone else, anyone else, who barely knew him. I had to call my brother later that evening for advice. He’s in his forties and takes medication for his ADHD. For some adults, ADHD is like being a superhero. You will run circles around everyone else and have this energy that just seems limitless. I’ll explain further next week. Concerning TL and Bubba, two of my brothers, they are superheroes who harnessed their ADHD for side of good.
I know everyone deals with these issues differently and may have a different opinion than I do and that’s okay. We’re all trying to make it out of this life alive. This blog is written to detail my journey, our journey, with a hurricane named Auggie.
***OCD… It’s not a switch. I shouldn’t, because it’s a free country, but I take issue when someone levels a picture or straightens a stack of papers and says, “that’s my OCD kicking in.”
If you don’t have OCD then you have a quirk. That’s it. A quirk. The O in OCD means obsessive. Obsessed. Being obsessed with leveling a picture would consume your world. Some people are obsessed with such things and it gives them great anxiety when they cannot fulfill that obsession on a mental and physical level. They can’t stop themselves most times. It’s not a switch. It’s their life. You have quirks or you have OCD. You can turn one of them off. Okay, I’m finished.
P.s. in bold just because OR next week…
The next entry will detail the conversation with my brother and a little on the effect of ADHD on a stay-at-home mother (the way I see it as a father.)